Moe Speaks: Seeking Legal Assistance


Do you see that?  It's photographic evidence that my property has been...converted!  Unlawfully converted!

Those squeaky toys may have technically entered the house in the Kid's Easter basket, but they were obviously just tucked in there as a means to conveniently convey them to me.  Pursuant to the customary terms of our unwritten family contact, all squeaky toys and small rubber objects that enter the house are the sole property of the terrier...fee simple absolute...and stuff....

This thievery cannot be tolerated in a civilized society.  Yes, that's what it is--thievery!  I think I need a criminal attorney, in fact.  Actually, I think that's what Mom does when she's not busy being my slave, maybe I should ask her advice....
Scratch that.  She obviously has a conflict of interest.